Fruitcake and Follicles

This is truly the season of giving, but have you noticed that everyone who has something to sell claims their product or service is 'the perfect gift for Christmas'? I just heard on the radio a commercial claiming that their product was 'the perfect gift for Christmas.' The product is a HAIR REMOVAL SYSTEM! It's not an ordinary hair removal system because it works with men and women, all races, all ages, all hair types, and any place on the human body. Not to mention people who breathe in and out. Now, I ask you: Would you like to receive a HAIR REMOVAL SYSTEM for Christmas? What does that mean for the giver (idiot)? They think you're some kind of simian creature who needs to stop combing their back hair and have all that foliage removed? And what about the receiver (victim)? Did you know you had a problem? Maybe you didn't realize you had a problem, and now an idiot has subtly suggested that might be the case.

As for me, I'm quite content with fruitcake. Figures.orangutan