Thoughts for Food

I have been for years, and continue to be, a thinker with regard to proper nutrition. Never one to back off from the ultimate test of food and drink value - does it taste good? - I have accumulated, over the years, a wealth of nutritional wisdom that you, intelligent reader, can now access via my "curlylarryandme" blog. At no extra charge, or initial charge, for that matter. First of all, biblical support for my premises: Since the Bible says in Proverbs, "A merry heart maketh like a medicine," does it not follow that food which makes one happy is a way to stay healthy without prescriptions and over-the-counter remedies? Look at me! Thank you. Also, the Bible said that it is not what goes into a man's mouth that defiles him, but what comes out of his mouth, I rest my case. I refer to this as my "Twinkie Defense" for much that I have found to be true. Now, there's no record of Jesus eating Twinkies, I am certain had they been available, He would have tried them. Not to mention Ho-Ho's, Ding-Dongs, and my personal favorite, Banana Flips (a fruit serving with a filling of protein-rich cream).

A few years ago all the food experts were saying butter was bad, and that a vegetable-based spread was better. Recent research says, no, not so fast pleasure-destroyers, that butter is actually good for you. I knew this in 9th grade. Much the same for red meat, gray meat, pink meat, and white meat. People who do not eat any of those things tend to be sullen, depressed, and envious of we free spirits who imbibe.

One brown beer per day is good for women. Two beers of any kind each day is good for men. This is recent, but I've known it all along. What else is good for women, in particular? Chocolate. I knew that, and so did lots of other guys over the centuries. I mean, what do we give women for Valentine's Day? Let's move on.

One final comment. Being slightly overweight (to me, that means within 30 lbs of what the nutrition snots/busybodies/nerds demand) is a good thing. Doctors who have wisdom will tell you that. It must be true, not only because I saw it on the news, but because I said so. My weight varies between 177 and 210, and you'll never meet a happier, healthier person.

Now, if this doesn't free you up and cheer you up, I give up. More next week, but perhaps another topic that will make you feel good about yourself, or give you a light moment laughing at me. Shalom!